Igniting a Focus on Goodness

Learning to protect our blessings through seeing only the good in people and situations

Many of us have learned the spiritual importance of not judging people and situations, and seeing the good instead. Yet, many of us have difficulty acting this way. This week, I wish to explain the spiritual laws that underlie this teaching so that it may serve as an impetus for us to truly see the good in everything.

Dormant Forces of Positivity and Negativity

Kabbalah teaches that we all have dormant forces within us - both positive and negative. These forces are awakened depending on where we focus our thoughts and consciousness. When we focus on the positive aspects in others, and in our life situations, we awaken the dormant positive forces within us. When we focus on others’ darkness and negativity, or on the negative aspects of our life situations, we awaken the dormant forces of negativity within us.

In our daily lives, we are all thrust into difficult interactions that lead us to judge and to see the worst in others. However, the kabbalists teach it is in our best interest to fight this innate tendency to obsess over the negativity we so plainly see – and to find only the good – because within every single one of us there exists these sleeping forces. Whether we are conscious of it or not, how we choose to view the world directly affects the latency or activation of these forces.

I always remember the Rav speaking about the fact that scientists are baffled because, although all people have dormant cancer cells, they can’t seem to figure out why they become active in some and remain inactive in others.

In the same regard, we all have hibernating forces of positivity and negativity within, and the triggering of these forces (through judging or seeing the good) is what determines whether we live a life marked by chaos and lack or joy and fulfillment.

Constant Supernal Assistance

A second point that ought to awaken us to want to see only the good in people and situations is that, kabbalistically, the only reason we are able to be the people we want to be is through the supernal assistance we are constantly receiving.

For those of us who think of ourselves as good, decent, spiritual people, it’s important to understand that it is only the constant support of the Light of the Creator that empowers us to be so. When we look at another person and judge them, subconsciously, it’s like we’re saying, “I am better than you because on my own I am able to be a better person.”

This thought – again, it’s something we are usually not conscious of – is a total denial of the supernal assistance our souls are in constant need and want of. So the Creator says to us, “If you think it’s all about you, then I will allow it to be all about you,” and the assistance is withdrawn, making us vulnerable to internal and external forces of negativity.

For most, this lesson of not judging and seeing the good is just that, a nice spiritual lesson. It sounds right when we read it, and yet when we are honest with ourselves, we see it does not provide a strong or real enough impetus to dismantle our innate judging apparatus.

This week, think about the two deeper explanations I have described to you. Find the good within every difficult person and situation you encounter, and this is by no means easy. In fact, at times it will be a struggle that you will fight at the very core of your being. However, this fight is the best, most proactive way to protect yourselves, to maintain your supernal protection and to awaken only the dormant forces of goodness within.

Happiness is Contagious

This time of year is often filled with much happiness, but also with stress. This article from TIME magazine gives us another reason to maintain our own happiness, and to surround ourselves with happy people. As it turns out, happiness is contagious:

“…What if not only behaviors but also moods and mental states work the same way? Can you catch a case of happy? Increasingly, the answer seems to be yes. That’s the intriguing conclusion from a body of work by Harvard social scientist Dr. Nicholas Christakis and his political-science colleague James Fowler at the University of California at San Diego…”

This is a great article becasue it backs up in scientific terms a spiritual concept Kabbalists have been teaching and practicing for literally thousands of years. Enjoy.

The Open Door

A kabbalistic lesson on how to care for the souls that come into our lives

Those of us involved with teaching others – and all of us are teachers to one degree or another, whether it’s for our children, friends, or colleagues – have a great responsibility in our hands. We must remember that at all times we are dealing with souls.

The other night I was studying with my son David, and we read a story I’ve read countless times, and yet it spoke to me in a new way. I share it with you now because within the simple story is a great awakening for the potential we have to save – or harm – someone’s life.

The story is about a well-loved kabbalist and one of his closest students. As was his custom, the student spent every holiday beside his beloved master. However, one year, as the holiday of Passover approached, the kabbalist pulled him aside and said, “This year you will not be spending the holiday with me.”

Distraught, the student circumvented his teacher’s wishes and appealed to the kindness of the kabbalist’s wife (who was unaware of her husband’s wishes), ingratiating himself to her by becoming indispensable in the cooking, cleaning, and preparation for Passover.

The day before Passover, he dropped a subtle hint of his predicament, and the wife took the bait and lobbied her husband on his behalf. The kabbalist responded, “If he is that important to you, then, yes, he can stay. But the truth is I fear he will create tremendous havoc for me.”

The student showed up the day of the big holiday, feeling tremendously pure and spiritually elevated. He secluded himself in the prayer room and began to pray. Suddenly, a vagrant appeared, seeking a blessing from the great kabbalist. The student smelled the stink of the man, both physically and spiritually, and shooed him away, without so much as lifting his head.

Moments later the kabbalist appeared, inquiring whether anyone came looking for him. “No, not a soul.” Again he asked, this time more insistently, “Has anyone come looking for me?!” “Well, there was this one filthy man who wanted to see you, but I know you don’t want to waste your time with such an insignificant person on such an important day.” The teacher turned to his student and stated with utter conviction, “If you do not bring him to my house now, I swear you will never see me again!”

Desperate, the student ran all over town, and only at the last minute did he locate the man in a tavern, three sheets to the wind, as they say. The man refused to acknowledge the student, so he threw the man over his shoulder and carried him to his teacher’s house. The teacher not only accepted the man, but he spent the entire holiday right beside him. The student, on the other hand, was made to sit way, way, way in the back.

After the holiday, the kabbalist called the student into his office. “Fifteen years ago this man was one of my closest students. There was a moment in his life when he did a terrible action, and he fell. And as often happens, he continued falling, spiritually and physically. I’ve been in pain all these years, praying and begging that something would open within him. Two weeks ago, I received a message in my prayers that he had created a small opening and had promised to himself, “I will reach out to my teacher one last time. If he accepts me, then I will know there is hope. If he rejects me, then I will have no more hope.”

I didn’t want you here this holiday because I know how ‘righteous’ you are and that you would close the door on him. The last door. You almost killed all hope for that man!

The lesson we learn from this, and may we all have it seared into our consciousness, is that when we are dealing with friends, spouses, children, students, and strangers, we never know the consequences and long-term effects of our words and actions. How many times are we too busy, too angry, or simply too preoccupied to answer our spouse, child, or friend with care and compassion?

This week, let us all awaken – and strengthen – our appreciation for how tremendously significant and delicate the souls are that come into our lives. May we awaken ourselves always to be concerned, aware and to always ask, “What is the best way to care for this soul?”

We want to ensure we are always opening doors for other souls to enter and elevate so they can become the best versions of themselves.